Sometimes when I’m driving or actually stealing a few minutes to myself, I find my mind wondering about the ‘what if’s’ of life.
What if I had made different choices? What if I had chosen not to move to Georgia so many years ago? What if I never gave up teaching? What if I hadn’t followed my heart and asked to hold his hand that warm May night in ’99?
Sometimes the ‘what if’s’ take me to a world that looks completely different from where I am today. They take me anywhere from a lonely existence to a fabulous life as a writer and social extraordinaire. They take me to a different locations, different circumstances, and an entirely different me.
I don’t think about these scenarios or situations with any sort of longing, but more with a strange curiosity. That’s part of what I love about writing. I have the chance to live the ‘what if’s’ through the safety of the page and with a sense of control that may have escaped me before.
It’s exhilarating. And, exhausting.
It’s fascinating. And, sad.
See, the truth of the whole ‘what if’ game is that, if I had made any one choice differently, I wouldn’t be right here, right now.
I wouldn’t be exactly where I am.
I wouldn’t be me. I’d be her.
And, frankly, there’s nothing she could offer that would make me change one minute of my reality. Those ‘what if’s’ aren’t nearly as good as my what is.
This post was inspired by the From Left to Write August book club featuring The Stuff that Never Happened by Maddie Dawson. In full disclosure I received a free copy of the book for this review.
Nice.
"I wouldn't be me. I'd be her. " – - This is very powerful and so very true. I love being a part of this book club. Our versions are so different but very much the same in essence.
Love your post! You are so right, every choice adds to the final product. If you do not like where you are in life you should work to change it, otherwise you should enjoy the moments.
Great post. I love the twists and turns of life that bring us to the couch we're sitting on right now at this very moment.
I definitely play the what if game. Can be fun but can be dangerous! Best to live with no regrets and find peace with the here and now. Sounds like you've done a good job of that!
I love the "what-if" game. But what I love most is the comfort of knowing where I am now and loving the choices that got me here.
"I wouldn't be me. I'd be her. " Wow, just wow! I was very close to writing a post about "unanswered prayers" that would have had the same message, but I'm glad I didn't, because what you just wrote here is way better. Seven words, two sentences, but they speak volumes!
"The what if's arent' nearly as good as my what is". This is my new life quote. Love.
Now I want to go change my entire post!!!
I was just playing the "what if" game today as I was thinking through my post for this book… Then a sad thought occurred to me. If I had instead of had not, I never would have met so many of the people who touched my life today. Like you said, "Those 'what if's' aren't nearly as good as my what is." Great post!
My favorite "inspired" book club post of them all! You had me at "I wouldn't be me. I'd be her." BTW, your post didn't make it onto the L2W blog list and it should have top billing! Looking forward to sharing more journeys via our fab group on left2write.
Well said! What a great perspective.