All of the follow quotes were taken from college level essays that I graded for one of my professors. Many were written by Sophomores and Juniors. Should we start praying now!?
“I always thought japanese and Koreans were the same race.”
“This is the first time I heard about ‘womanhood.’ I though there was only manhood.”
“Brazilian women do not swim because big arms and shoulders are not acceptable in their culture. They avoid that because in their culture that is unattractive to men.”
“The American Cancer Society doesn’t seem like everyone’s first pick as the most fun group to be a member of.”
“Nowadays the number of less fortunate, lower class people are able to participate in golf due to the enormous amount of programs allowing them to play on actual courses.”
“Black history month is a time for people of African American or Black descent to come together and celebrate something as an ethnic group by themselves. Whites, Mexicans, and Asians, do not really celebrate this month because they are not black and do not share the experiences that people of African American race share such as oppression of slavery, discrimination, or having ancestors who have died because they were fighting for their freedom.”
“The kids are only in high school, they shouldn’t have their minds set on being gay that early in life.”
And, yes. The rest of the essays are as bad as you’re thinking. And, I’m sure you wouldn’t be at all surprised to know that one student quoted Lil’ Wayne as a means of demonstrating diversity.
I’d request hazard pay for all the brain cells I lost by grading them, but the budget cuts…
This just made my life. Thank you, I needed a good laugh. And at the same time I shake my head for our future. On a thing of my coffee creamer I had it literally said
"WARNING NOT TO BE USED AS INFANT FORMULA"
Sad, sad.
Oh, SNAP. Seriously? My 5 year old could have done better on an essay! Poor you. No wonder your professor asked YOU to grade them while he/she giggled away the weekend.
You reminded me why I don't miss teaching….
Those are great!
Oh man. Sadly that is pretty typical!! I had a student turn in an essay that every single sentence was the hugest run-on ever (I'm talking half a page!)!!
In another class I had a guy who had really awful writing, and I found out he was homeschooling his children! It seems the worst writing is coming from those that are the freshest out of high school.
Funny and quite scary at the same time. Hope some of those kids plan on doing manual labor the rest of their lives.
Shudder, shudder, gasp. I think I'll share these with some of my students. You know, the ones who say, "Why should I learn to write?" and then say, "I'm going to college." Does not compute.
I knew you'd appreciate this!
Yes, quite scary!
those weren't even all of them.
Homeschooling!? Oh, Lord…
It certainly was a test of my patience..and gag reflex.
That was my first thought when I started grading them.
happy to add laughter to the day!
mopheadmom – if they actually get a degree they probably will have a management job somewhere.
UGH. I just cannot stand poorly constructed essays. I am in college right now and it is online – us students have to write short essays, one or two each week, and then discuss what each other has written.
I learn to avoid those that I just cannot comment on without coming off rude.
I can't believe it, OMG, college student!
I've been to Brazil and saw plenty of people in the water…but were they women?? I'll have to go back and check my pictures! Funny post (funny in a sad kind of way).
Oh my goodness! Are you kidding me?!!? This is what college students are writing? Oh dear God… well… um… I guess this makes the marking part easy, right? Sheesh!
I HAVE A TAG FOR YOU. YOUR IT!