December 2008 Archives - 3/3

Things I learned while unpacking some of our Christmas decorations today

December 5, 2008 By Neena 4 Comments

We have 7 dressers in our house and only 5 people
My holiday village puts my weirdos in a trance for hours!
The baby can eat Styrofoam and candles as a two course meal.
I miss my mom
I’m 30 years old and feel weird about missing my mom, but it doesn’t make the ‘missing’ go away
Someone smack me if I ever try to buy more crap
I don’t understand why I own a Christmas moose
Put a bow on something or garland around something and anything can be Christmas-y (including a ceramic frog)
It is officially time for seasonal liquor! (Not that I am a fan of liquor, but mix it with something peppermint-like and hubby is bound to have a good night – I’m just sayin‘)
Oh, and there is no such thing as kid glue. Anything with the word ‘glue’ on it should be subtitled ‘keep away from those little f*$%ers or you’ll spend hours cleaning your kitchen table’)

Tomorrow the tree goes up and the shopping gets finished. I will consume at least one white chocolate mocha without guilt and at least one with tons of guilt. I’ll spend at least an hour gazing at the beauty of the house at Christmas (and I’ll do that from the inside where it is warm while I secretly mock Hubby for saying yes to putting up outside lights!) What a weekend!

Filed Under: christmas

are ya willing to cut a deal?

December 4, 2008 By Neena 1 Comment

Psst! Hey kid…I need to talk to you. Listen, I know you’re a baby and you really don’t have any motor skills or anything yet and you’re not quite capable of negotiating, but I gotta give it a shot.

See, your daddy is working late tonight. I mean uber-late! And, I have that weirdo holiday party to take your sister to tonight, so do you think you could do me a favor? Do you think you could give mommy a break tonight and not wake up crying?

I know that is a lot to ask considering you are cutting like 47 teeth and all, but do you think you could give it a try. I would be eternally grateful if you would be willing to quit pooping all over yourself in the night as well. Call me crazy, but I’m thinking the teeth and poop and teaming up and causing both of us to miss out on the glorious evening ritual of sleep. That’s just my theory. So what do you say? Think you can cut mama some slack here?

So, is that a ‘no’? I can’t really decipher your crazy baby body language.

Filed Under: charlotte, photo

Delete!

December 3, 2008 By Neena 5 Comments

Okay, I wrote another post today but it was too angry for a Wednesday.

So I deleted it. Then I took a bath, had some hot tea, and pigged out on Monkey Munch.

Instead of ranting I’ll just post a pictures of the baby and I at the beach on Jekyll Island this past weekend. She’s so friggin cute that it is almost impossible to be angry with that weight of that on your shoulders.

The End

Filed Under: photo

This post brought to you by my new son, J-Z Yo!

December 2, 2008 By Neena 3 Comments

Yo! This is a shout out to all my preschool peeps! Check out my new digs. My Mama hooked me up with a hat and gloves to get me through these frigid times, yo! Check out my wicked pose as I model their sweetness!

You don’t need no pants when you look as good as I do. Besides, it’s all for the ladies. I gotta get back to my coloring book now. Peace! See ya ’round the playground!

Filed Under: jake, photo

Nothing says ‘welcome home’ like…

December 1, 2008 By Neena 5 Comments

Vomit and diarrhea!

That’s right, my friends.

I woke up this morning basking in the soon to come glory that meant hubby was back at work and two of the three kids were back at school. I planned to take a shower, do some naked dancing , and sing up to the Heavens that my house was virtually empty. (Hey, I just made it through Thanksgiving and I can still wear my smaller jeans – you bet your ass I wanted to dance naked!) I planned a trip to the craft store to purchase more knitting supplies and even planned to treat myself to a white chocolate mocha – you know, just to taunt the skinny jeans a bit.

But, no.

My son decided it would be a better idea to do some projectile vomiting all over the TV this morning rather than allow mommy to continue with her selfish plans. Take that, Wiggles! He topped it off with some explosive diarrhea that he has so lovingly shared with the baby. And, let me just tell you how well those baby diapers hold explosive diarrhea!

Okay, I’ll spare you the details on that one as my act of kindness for today.

So, now I’m just sitting around praying that this is only some 24 hour thing so that I can send his butt to school tomorrow and get on with my selfishness.

Dang, I wish these kids could be more considerate of me!