The UNspectacular of me

I was tagged by one of my newest readers (and a rather funny blogger herself!!) to create a list about myself.  The purpose of the list is to come up with things about myself that are rather unspectacular.  Only 5 or 6!?  But, there are so many! (note my sarcasm, please)

Here’s hoping you learn something…or, at least, that you don’t go running away forever.  
So here goes!  The five UNspectacular things about me:
  • I have a complete and total fear of the interstate.  Yes, my friends.  I live in the suburbs of a major metropolis and I don’t get on the interstate.  Ever.  I will go out of my way, with time, distance, and resources, to avoid the interstate at all costs.  My friends and family laugh about this, but it is a genuine panic and fear.  Hell, I’d rather pay a $200 taxi fee then drive to the airport to pick up someone.  But, the up side of all this is that I kick ass a finding the back roads!  I’m just sayin’…
  • I always try to give a courtesy wave at least twice, if not three times, when someone lets me out in traffic.  I believe that doing it multiple times insures my next ‘get out of traffic’ free card!  
  • I decorate with books.  Yep.  I have books and shelves all over my house.  I have read most of the books and will probably not read many of them again, but I feel they must be on display and within reach.  I don’t feel at home unless I’m surrounded by my books.  Screw pictures and paint.  I want my books!  If hubby and I ever get divorced he can keep the house…cause I’m taking the books!
  • I had extremely bad acne growing up.  I was self conscious about it for many years until it started to go away.  I used to pile on the makeup just to try and hid all the blemishes.  Now, I don’t wear makeup at all!  Weird that I spend so much time worrying about how my face looked and now it isn’t even a consideration.  I don’t worry about wrinkles, lines, or any of that stuff.  My face is just one part of me.  
  • I have three tattoos.  I have one on my ankle, one on my shoulder, and one on my lower back.  I like them.  I have every intention of getting three more.  Someday.  
So, there ya go.  Some stuff about me.  I’m kind of neurotic, but that’s the way it goes.  Now, for the rules:
-Link to the person that tagged you
-mention the rules on your blog
-tell 5 or 6 of your own quirky things
-Tag 6 bloggers.  Link them and go leave them a comment that they have been tagged.  
I’m going to give a general shout to anyone reading.  Tag!  

another word about scarecrows (with some photos for kicks)

We drove around town tonight to get a look at the scarecrows that have been put on display.  It gave us something to do with the kids after dinner.  Plus, I turn off the AC today and hubby was dying to get in the car and enjoy the air for a bit.  Here are a few ‘groups’ of scarecrows that we saw just along one main road.  

Of course, there were my two favorite scarecrows I just had to share: toilet man and chick with boobs.  


Sadly, I missed the picture of the one holding the beer can and the one giving the folks that drive by the ‘shocker.’  
Yep.  
There’s a house for sale up the street if anyone is interested…
Didn’t think so.  

scarecrows and vegetable plates

The day began by sending my daughter off to school looking like this.  Yea, this was my attempt to dress her up like a scarecrow for her Pre-K class.  Why?  Well, let me tell you the exciting news around my town (and if you didn’t catch the sarcasm…shame!)
My little southern town is attempting to get in the Guinness Book of World Records by displaying the most scarecrows (live children don’t count).  Yep.  The town is attempting to display 4000 scarecrows by September 1st.  The kids were dressing up to support the town even.  That’s the big news around here.  Scarecrows.  My dear friend, RM, drove through town today and her three year old daughter pointed out to her that she didn’t like the scarecrows because they’re scary.  That is a wise child.   So, I sent my kid out into the world wearing her brother’s shirt, a basket from her Ma’s house and daddy’s dew rag from his punk rock days.  That’s the best I could do with stomach flu, folks.  
Even though she’s been sick herself, my dear mother-in-law brought us dinner from Cracker Barrel tonight.  Never in my life have I seen an 8 month old child create such a mess with a 3-veggie plate!  Oy!  I asked hubby if he wanted the kid or the kitchen.  I ended up with the kid…and a bathtub that need to be cleaned.  But, I didn’t hesitate to photograph her sitting in her baby filth before cleaning her up.  That’s just the kind of mother I am!

My daughter is the outbreak monkey

And, she didn’t arrive with a younger, cuter Patrick Dempsey playfully going by the name Jimbo.  No, she just came with her own version of a virus.  Where’s my damn antidote!??

I am dying to take a bath in Lysol and have developed a serious hatred for the Activa yogurt folks.  Occasional irregularity is a freakin‘ joy compared to what is happening within the quarantine of this house.  
School is officially back in session.  It is time for the continuous exchange of the creepy crud. Even if it is only preschool, both will be bringing home every bacteria, virus, and snot case known to man.  I’ll be investing in the orange juice farms of sunny Florida and taking stock in the tissue company before ya know it! 
I’m considering life as a hermit…
I tend to get a bit dramatic when I’m sick.  It’s a gift.  

ewe…

We all have the stomach flu. It’s poop and vomit city over here. I can’t even begin to fathom the amount of disinfectant it will take when this is all done.

Hopefully we’ll be somewhat coherent tomorrow.

‘night…

rainy, rainy Monday

I love days like today!  As much as sunshine and warmth and breeze can be energizing, I prefer days like today.  It is cloudy and gray outside.  It has been drizzling off and on all morning and more rain is expected for the next few days.  It isn’t really chilly outside, but it looks like it would be.  Days like today make me feel like cooking up a big ol’ pot of stew or soup, curling up on the couch, and losing myself in the pages of a great book.  It is one of those days that makes my heart burst because I know Fall, my favorite season, is just around the corner.   Today lets me know that jackets, layers, scarves, pumpkins, and holidays are one their way to make their yearly visit. Soon we will turn back the clocks and start our own version of ‘hibernation’ for the colder months.  

I am happy to say goodbye to the heat and longer days of summer.  And, I’m even happier to welcome the hearty, cooler festivities of the coming season.  
Hello, Fall.  I’ve missed you!  I can’t wait to show my children your colors and leaves.  I can’t wait to continue our tradition of pumpkins, costumes, and food that feeds the soul.  I welcome every chance to use my hands and my kitchen to bake and create those wonderful flavors that come with your visit.  I look forward to opening my windows and feeling your slightly chilled air refresh my home and my soul.  Thank you for this preview.  I’ll be waiting for the full show!

Just for laughs

Happy Sunday, Folks!  Now, go to bed!

thinking about a career change

It has been an evening of tears in our house.  Yes, it seems that everyone is in uber meltdown mode.  The oldest is crying because she got in trouble for not putting her toys away not an hour after we cleaned her room.  The middle child is having a breakdown because he can’t find some moose or camel toy that is essential to the imaginary scenario he’s working on.  The baby has been producing gallons of tears because her daddy is walking around the house and not giving her the undivided attention she is demanding at this particular moment.  

All these tears are making me consider a career change.  What would I do with myself if I were not a full time mommy attempting a freelance writing career?  What would I possibly do with my time?  Here’s my top five:
  • Professional napper – hey, I’m tired from having all these babies, okay!  I could definitely excel at this career given the fact that I have not slept well in over four year.  Add my recent hot flashes to the mix and I anticipate many more nights of bad slumber.  But, I can always nap like a champ!
  • Ruler of my own planet – I like to be in control and I tend to be stubborn and always right.  This job is perfect for me!
  • Johnny Depp’s housekeeper – Who cares if I have to clean his toilets, wash his clothes, and tend to his every whim…it’s freakin‘ Johnny Depp!  
  • Animal Cop – full police powers and I’d get to help all the poor and helpless animals of the world.  Hubby could never give me crap about bringing home an animal again!  And, I would carry a gun.  Me with a gun…I would so kick ass with a gun!
  • Nothing!  Yea, I know this one is not very productive and not really benefiting society and stuff, but please refer back to number one…I’m tired, okay!
My babies are all getting ready for bed.  Soon my house will be quiet and the children will be dreaming of all the weird little things they love.  The tears will stop and I will have survived another day.  That is enough to make me say, ‘damn, I’m a good mom!’  Hey, sometimes just surviving is an achievement in this job we call parenting.  
Maybe I’ll just keep this job.  You know, since I’m already here and stuff.  

8 months of Puddin

My baby.  My last child.  My precious Charlotte got her first tooth today.  This is exciting and terrifying considering she’s cutting 6 teeth at the same time!  Maybe they’ll all pop through overnight.  Maybe she’ll wake up fully able to chew steak.  Maybe Mamaneena is delusional and in need of a cocktail.  
This is what she looks like when she’s teething:


This is what she looks like every other moment of her life:
She’s cute and full of smiles.  She was born with an iron grip that she often uses on her daddy’s chest hair and her Ma’s glasses.  She has no intention of letting the older siblings speak for her and shouts her opinion whenever possible.  She is completely in love with her daddy and cries when he leaves in the morning.  When he gets home at night she can’t crawl to him fast enough.  She sleeps with a white noise machine and often has full conversations with herself while sound asleep.  She prefers to make her older brother laugh, but loves to hear her older sister sing.  She loves waffles and bananas and oranges.  She finds anything and everything to put in her mouth and has a love of diet dog food (thanks, chloe).  She has pulled up a handful of times and seems to think my bra is a handle made just for that.  She blows bubbles in the tub like a seasoned swimmer and crosses her legs in the car seat like a little lady.  She is the pictures of happiness first thing in the morning as if she wants the whole world to know that it is great just to be alive.  She adores the dog and finds joy in chasing the fatter of the two cats.  She imitates sounds, blows raspberries, and always allows me to kiss her feet. 
Yes, my baby got her first tooth today.  And, Mamaneena got all sappy.  

Genius Bar

I spent the better part of this evening at the Apple Store.  My newest baby, Macbook, had a faulty power cord.  Me, being the anal/obsessive/impatient person that I am needed it fixed.  Now.  I scheduled an appointment, called up the trusty in-laws for kid watch, grabbed hubby as he walked in the door from work, and ran to the store.  

They fixed the problem, of course.  There was no charge and I learned some swell new tricks about this lovely little machine I now own.  I was thrilled with the service.  I am excited and fascinated about the concept of the Genius Bar.  I am grateful to the Genius.  
I love you, Macbook!!!!!
Then I went to Target and bought a whole series of books about vampires that are meant for young adults.  There was an apple on the cover of one of them.  
I guess this Thursday kind of had a theme.  Oh, well.  
I love you, Macbook!!!!!